Wednesday, January 30, 2008

hardware store

After weeks of unsuccessfully searching for the perfect necklace to go with the perfect dress and shoes for an event on Friday night, I did a very "Doris" thing. I thought – I'll make it!

I bought two necklaces. Individually, I care for neither one. But I like elements of each. So, I bought both. And you know… if I think I can build it, create it, craft it, or dream it, I'm gonna try.

That means… disassemble the two necklaces and create one I like from the favorable elements of each.

I needed a pair of needle nose pliers to accomplish this and, believe it or not, that's one item I don't have in my tool box. A new hardware store opened it town, so I decided to check it out.

I came straight from work – heels, dressy pants, sleek fitted blouse – looked very Ann Taylor.

Out front, two men wearing red Ace vests stood talking. As soon as I pulled up (driving my mom's Stratus – a very un-Doris car), they watched. I knew what they were thinking. "Clueless – 3:00." It was like when the last-picked comes to bat and the pitcher signals for the outfielders to move closer. I felt them swarm.

I ignored them and entered through the automatic doors. This was certainly not my first trip to a hardware store. I mean, geez, sometimes I walk around Lowe's just to get the creative juices flowing. I created entire luncheon centerpieces for an outdoor mural unveiling from parts and pieces I found at Home Depot. No, I don't build houses and I try to steer clear of put-it-together-yourself furniture, but otherwise I like to build, create, craft (no, not with popsicle sticks and q-tips), and dream! A hardware store – what better place to think outside the box?

Reading the signs over the aisles, I quickly knew where to find the needle nose pliers. I'm not Miss South Carolina, afterall.

One foot down the aisle and I heard the inevitable. "Can I help you with something, Miss?"

I can't help but wonder if I'd pulled up in my truck wearing overalls, a ball cap, chewing on a reed of grass and speaking with my best hick impression if I might have been left alone. I actually wanted to walk around the store and check out the new place. But instead, I had an escort.

Eh, who knows? Maybe next time I'll carry a mini-dog in my handbag and say, "I believe... that I am lost in the hardware store because the US Americans don't have maps and our education such as in the Iraq everywhere like such as..." (Ref: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj3iNxZ8Dww)

But if you're wondering… from the two, I successfully created one necklace that works great with the outfit! Go me!