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Another parking ticket. I'm losing count. $65. Stupid, stupid California laws.

I have tint-free windows on my truck now, thanks to one idiotic, hotshot, just-out-of-the-academy cop. And probably a $111 fine... find out in February at my court appearance.

Can you tell I have a small problem with how things operate here?

I mean, the cops are more concerned with the tint on my windows than they are with the drug deals taking place behind the mini-mart, or the drunk driver swerving through town, or the moron using the emergency lane to weave through 3-8pm traffic. Oh, that's right. It's not 5 o'clock traffic in LA. It's 3-8pm traffic.

And yet, it's legal for the motorcycle driver to ride the white line. Come on, he's not even in a lane, people!

For your amusement, here are a few more dumb and stupid California laws:

State Laws:
-Women may not drive in a house coat.
-No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
-Bathhouses are against the law.
-It is illegal to own a snail, a sloth, or an elephant as a pet.

City Laws:
Arcadia
-Peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.

Baldwin Park
-Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.

Blyth
-You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.

Bulringame
-It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds.

Carmel:
-Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
-Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk.

Chico
-Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine. (this sounds like a place I want to visit)

Lodi
-It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String."

Long Beach:
-It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
-Cars are the only item allowed in a garage.

Los Angeles:
-Toads may not be licked.
-You may not hunt moths under a streetlight.
-It is a crime for dogs to mate within 500 yards of a church. Breaking this law is punishable by a fine of $500 and/or six months in prison.
-You cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
-It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
-It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent.

Ontario
-Roosters may not crow in the city limits.

Palm Spring
It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.

Prunedale
-Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.

Riverside
-One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.

San Diego
-The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.

San Francisco:
-Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street.
-Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash. (but wait, I thought it was illegal to own an elephant as a pet)
-It is illegal to wipe one's car with used underwear.

San Jose
-It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs.

Hollywood
-It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.

Dana Point
-One may not use one's own restroom if the window is open.

Indian Wells:
-Drinking intoxicating cement is prohibited. (someone has done this - you they have)
-Crushing rocks in the city limits is forbidden.

Norco:
-All persons wishing to keep a rhinoceros as a pet must obtain a $100 license first.
-Growing oleander flowers is illegal.

Shasta Lake
-One may not raffle off a dog as a gift in any public place.

Walnut:
-Children may not wear a halloween mask unless they get a special permit from the sheriff.
-Males may not dress as a female unless a special permit is obtained from the sheriff.
-One may not leave sand in their own driveway.
-Kites may not be flown above 10 feet over the ground.